Old love rediscovered

I have rekindled my love affair with the poet Dorothy Parker. I discovered her in High School and at 15 found her words earth-moving. At 22 I feel the same way. Here are two of her poems that I can't get out of my head.

Resume

Razors pain you;

Rivers are damp:

Acids stain you;

And drugs cause cramp.

Guns aren't lawful;

Nooses give;

Gas smells awful;

You might as well live.

De Profundis

Oh, is it, then, Utopian

To hope that I may meet a man

Who'll not relate, in accents suave,

The tales of girls he used to have?